Mar 062011
Authors: Lydia Jorden

Now is the time to ditch the creeper living with you and search for some fresh blood to replace them.

Spring semester ends in May, which leads to students scrambling to find the perfect place to live. CSU tries to help students find and work with roommates by hosting programs such as Roommate Round-up and organizations like Off-Campus Life.

Roommate can be broken up into room and mate. Synonyms describing “mate” include, friend, pal, buddy, chum and companion. I’m sure you have had roommates in your life that certainly do not encompass the preceding terms. In fact, trying to find a room“mate” can be a difficult endeavor.

I understand the frustration of finding new roommates, as I have been the victim of the worst room“enemies.”

Below are roommates — both good and bad — that you may or may not encounter:

Bad Roommates

The Cleaner: “The cleaner” introduces himself or herself with a hesitant handshake. You notice this individual to have extremely dry and chapped hands –– from what? Cleaning, of course. The cleaner takes pride in holding house meetings to ensure chores are allocated between roommates, but are consistently unsatisfied. Thus, they re-clean. The cleaner’s anger continues to loom over the house, forcing them to be the first roommate marginalized.

The Dirtball: This is the dirty one. A friendly person, but dirty, and the second person marginalized.

The Drunk: The drunk will pound on your bedroom door, only to assure their self-worth.
“How do I look?” Low-self esteem is one characteristic your drunken counterpart embodies. The drunk will consistently cry at about 1 a.m. on Friday night when they fall into the emotional pit of drunken emotions. They think no one loves them and are unattractive, which forces roommates to have to feed the ego. Sometimes they then puke.

The drunk can bring humor to your day, and is generally a likeable person. With their bizarre tendencies, you find yourself joining them in “Cry Fest 2011” as you reflect on your horrible decision to room with them.

The horny one: Without going into details, let just say, you hear things. Fail.

Good Roommates

The Perfect Find: Like a good pair of shoes, this roommate is not easy to find. However, once you find them, you know they are worth keeping. To find this roommate I suggest you stay off Craigslist. Why settle for famous footwear when you can have DSW? Instead, scour CSU’s roommate forum for an individual who has a charming description and will embrace warm conversation, cooking, and when necessary, silence — which is golden.

The Recluse: This person lives in the house, but other roommates almost wouldn’t know it. The recluse goes about their day, everyday, and will interact for only minutes. This person is pleasant, and often has a long-term boy or girlfriend. They too, enjoy silence.

A Sheep in Wolf’s Clothing: This little sheep can be found almost anywhere. However, they are difficult to uncover. For example, some potheads make the best roommates. Don’t judge nudists, they can be friends for life. You often need to look past the immediate turn-offs, because that person may be a gem.

Take these considerations to heart before you choose a roommate and good luck in your quest.

Lydia Jorden is a sophomore business major who enjoys playing “roommate matchmaker.” Her column appears Mondays in the Collegian. Letters and feedback can be reached at

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