Feb 272011
Authors: Lydia Jorden

I never knew cleaning a room in a hotel would be the start of a potential lawsuit.

Being a housekeeping trainer over the summer taught me many lessons. I learned the importance of working with international employees. I learned crucial customer relation skills.

But the most stimulating and thought-provoking lesson I learned was that, regardless of where you go, you will never escape chaos surrounding other people’s lives.

It is important for you, my fellow CSU community, to consider my personal anecdotes the next time you find yourself staying at a hotel to avoid pissing off the maid who may –– or may not –– change your sheets and to learn the appropriate hotel guest etiquette.

After knocking three times and yelling “housekeeping” to no response, I routinely opened the door to a guest’s room. I began my first monotonous task of changing the sheets on the bed to get it ready for the next guest.

Under the linens I found what would soon be the reason for my meeting with the owner of the hotel and my supervisor: A pillow. This wasn’t just any pillow. This was a special pillow: a pillow near and dear to the owner’s heart. The words, “Love” danced across the front of the purple pillow case. The cursive writing … eh, ew wait, what’s that smell? This pillow case was clearly wet and had an odd smell of Demur Fragrance’s “Sex on the Beach.”

Normally we will keep items that guests accidently leave in their rooms and will attempt to contact them to let them know we will send it their way. However, I’m sure most would agree that a pillow soaked in mystery secretions is not on the top list of things one would want to hold onto.

About three weeks later I got called into my supervisor’s office and he explained to me that the owners of that pillow were going to press charges against us because we threw away their cotton ball of love. This only further cements my ideology that humanity is doomed.

I took it with a grain of salt because the hotel would be held accountable for vicarious liability which states that the employer may have to pay damages for what the employee did –– good news for me.

Luckily, charges were not filed and my only punishment was a slap on the wrist for not keeping that disgusting pillow.

Now of course this wasn’t the only amusing thing that happened while working at a hotel. Naked couples answering doors, wedding party’’s pushed-together beds and rooms filled with personal Jesus memorabilia all stay fresh in my mind.

Please, please, please be considerate when staying at a hotel. If you leave your purple pillow with “Love” written across it in beautiful cursive writing, do not threaten to press charges when I throw it out.

Moral of the story: Next time you run into a pillow coated in unidentified juices, hold onto it. You never know when it may just save your ass.

Until next time, I’m off to cuddle up to my purple ball of fluff that I obtained from –– uh, never mind.

Lydia Jorden is a sophomore business major who always changed the sheets of her guests. Her column runs Mondays in the Collegian. Letters and feedback can be reached at letters@collegian.com.

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