To all Facebook users: If your status is more than two sentences long, most of your friends wonâ€™t take the time to read it.
To my humanities teacher: Thanks for getting our quiz off SparkNotes, good to see my money go to good use.
To the guy who chalked â€œIâ€™m sorryâ€ all over the Plaza: Thereâ€™s a Hallmark card for that.
To the professor who chatted loudly with the TA while the class was taking an exam: I better get extra points for the distraction factor.
To the kid wearing 3D glasses around campus: Youâ€™re not in Wonderland anymore.
If youâ€™re trying to play guitar and I keep turning up my music, itâ€™s because you suck.