For one godforsaken hour Wednesday, all things turned to chaos.
The world, well more like just northern Colorado (and even more specifically the Collegian newsroom), was lost to the darkness of a previous age.
An age without THE INTERNET.
Shrieks could be heard from miles away. Phonebooks were flying across the room. Actual reporting and research footwork was being done.
But how, how were we supposed to update the Web site without Internet? How were we supposed to put out a paper? Does anyone actually read the newspaper?
Clearly, all news is found online.
Plus, thereâ€™s only so much reporting that can be done without the aid of Google.
You see, the Internet is a complicated series of tubes leading to this box called a monitor. And in this monitor we find an unlimited amount of information, which is plenty for us â€œmodern journalistsâ€ to write a story.
Somehow, someway, all those wires and electrodes and (technical jargon here) find their way onto the very same screen that we write articles on, which makes our job exponentially easier than it was for those old fogies who advise us.
But it does bring up one question: how did all those â€œseasoned journalistsâ€ report before the World Wide Web was created by Al Gore?
No, it wasnâ€™t hilarious when we approached them with this question. Sitting there laughing hysterically didnâ€™t help us with our problem.
Alas, after all the hoopla, the Internet was restored and all younger than 30 exclaimed, â€œHuzzah.â€
God bless America.