Letter to the editor

Jan 272009
Authors: Phillip Kelly

Mr. McSwane,

My many (maybe misplaced) but magniloquent compliments on your maladroit move from mollycoddle to machismo. But, your malicious machination of mangled malarkey mandates my manifestation, as a man on a mission.

Masquerading as magnanimous, methinks Mr. McSwane’s missive meanders in a motley, melodramatic manner, meddling madly in a milieu he malevolently misconstrues, making a mockery of masses of model men.

David’s delusional diatribe decries defensive devices, deadening debate of disarmament through deceptive descriptions of dibbling dupes, neglecting diacritical diagnoses of dialogue. Doffing diffidence, I indignantly diffuse my diligent dilettantism in this debut. Down with deception! Debilitating decent individual’s defenses out of deference to degenerates is deleterious!

Delirious delinquents demand disarmament, demeaning democratic decisions deployed to depose depravity. Deprecators of derringers desire desolation, devoid of dissidence, but not of destructive devices, which will be diacritically dispossessed to dictators, who will dispense discerning destruction to dissenters, disencumbering them of independence.

Firearms, frequently found in the first few freedoms fought for by founding fathers, are famed for their fascinating faculty of forming fearsome factions of foes, facilitated by feverish, farfetched fanfares full of fallacies. Such fabricated fables fail to fix their facade factually, faute de mieux fastidiously filling us with fluff.

Far from false, firearm favorers find the FBI a fine fellowship for fending off fanciful frauds. Fascinatingly, legal firearms frequently are not found facilitating felonies.

It is folly to fear a firearm, and fomenting a fervent following to further freeze our already frangible freedoms is foolish. I feel firearms not to be a phylactery, but a fantastic phantasm of freedom. Freedom from this phobia of firearms is a fundamental phase needed for full fathoming of the forum.

Phillip Kelly


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