Apr 292008
Authors: Nick Hemenway

If you’re like me, you have been laughing ever since Super Tuesday left the Democratic race in a dead heat.

Twenty-four states, including Colorado, moved their primaries or caucuses to Super Tuesday to ensure their importance in the presidential race, yet with Feb. 5 far behind us, the focus has shifted to the remaining states such as North Carolina and Kentucky. However, the longer the race continues, the more the spotlight shines on Denver.

As it stands right now, Barack Obama has 1,723 votes, while Hillary trails with 1,592. Every remaining state is critical for both candidates now.

You may be asking yourself, why do Republicans care about the Democratic primaries?

Well, thanks for asking. Republicans love the battle between Obama and Clinton because they are fighting our battles for us.

Regardless of who wins the Democratic nomination, it is in our best interest to have a long, drawn-out battle between them, so when it finally comes time for the two parties to confront each other, Democrats will be divided, sullied and broken.

But don’t think Republicans are just sitting by the sidelines.

Since the all out war between Democrats began, Rush Limbaugh has been leading an operation to perpetuate the fight: Operation Chaos.

While the mainstream media won’t acknowledge its effect, Operation Chaos has been wreaking havoc in the Democratic race.

Here is how you play the hottest game since hungry-hungry hippos: Republicans living in states with upcoming primaries switch their party affiliation to either Democrat or Independent, depending on election rules.

This way, they will be able to cast their vote for the Democratic candidate who is losing, thus pushing the battle forward. After this, the “operative” switches back to the Republican Party. Victory.

Given the fact this may be the first time you’ve heard of it, you may think it is only a small operation, and you would be wrong.

CBS News reports that just before last week’s primaries in Pennsylvania, 306,918 new people registered as Democrats. Out of those people 160,752 were Republicans or Independents who switched their affiliation at the last second.

Hillary won that primary by a little over 200,000 votes. Coincidence? I think not.

The other major benefit of perpetual war between Democrats is money.

Thus far, both Obama and Clinton have raised dramatically more money than McCain has. However, both Democrats have wasted piles of it battling each other.

The Federal Elections Commission reports that Obama has raised more than $102 million and spent nearly $84 million. Meanwhile, Clinton has raised $116 million and spent $78 million.

With the race remaining so close, it doesn’t look like their spending will slow any time soon.

This is great news for McCain, who only has $3 million left out of the $41 million he has garnered throughout his race, which has him scrambling for more.

Amid his lead role in the campaign finance reform act, I find it poetic justice that McCain’s campaign is in deep financial trouble. Maybe he should listen to conservatives once in a while.

Since there is still so much uncertainty in the presidential campaigns, Denver will surely play a central role in the Democratic nomination process.

With all the attention and money that will inevitably rain down on Denver, I find myself changing my mind about the Democratic National Convention. Let them come, let them waste more money.

I happen to be a super delegate, and I can be bribed with Benjamins and Mountain Dew.

Nick Hemenway is a senior mechanical engineering major. His column appears Wednesdays in the Collegian. Letters and feedback can be sent to letters@collegian.com.

 Posted by at 5:00 pm

Sorry, the comment form is closed at this time.