To the girl that clipped me on her bike Thursday morning: “On your left” doesn’t work when the person is wearing headphones. It’s called a bike lane. USE IT.
To the parent who decided to yell at me for not telling them which room their freshmen daughter was in, thank you for your feedback on my job performance. Regretfully, I will ignore it should some thug make a similar inquiry. My apologies in advance.
To the guy who answered in a class of two hundred students that the melting point of plastic was 75 degrees Fahrenheit … wow. I digress and return to my puddle of a chair.
To the people in the blue car heading east on Mulberry at Shields on Thursday: I’m sorry I cut you off. I was in a hurry to get where I was going but that’s no excuse to put you in danger by driving like a d***. I’m sorry.
ATTN All Bicyclers: When you don’t stop at a 4-Way stop I will run you over with my pickup, cause if you would like to be treated like a vehicle I will.
I hate to say it, but CU totally won the Life Threatening Events During the First Week of School competition. I mean, come on. A girl getting bit by a non-poisonous snake versus a kid getting his neck slashed by an insane guy? Did we even have a chance?