My roommate tries to drown herself at night – her new year’s resolution was to drink a gallon of water a day, but I have heard of people overdosing on water. Could she be suicidal?
The secret to one-ply toilet paper is to just use double what you normally would.
To the girl that sat next to me in the 12 o’clock personal computing class, you want to go out to dinner sometime? If yes, sit next to me again on Friday.
To the sweet guy who held the door for me after almost running me over in the stairwell in Hartshorn… Same stairwell, same awkward dance, same time tomorrow?
To the guy that eye-flirted with me for almost an hour in the library: that look I gave you when I got up and left meant, “Seriously! All of that build up and you don’t even come over here?!?”