I want to know something – how do I add 100 words to a column that has already said everything I want it to say? I could filibuster this situation, but that’s just boring. I could come up with something witty or dazzle you with insight, but that’s too hard. So while I’m only at 55 words, I think I’m just going to start this one up and say that 478 words is enough for this week, thanks for bearing with me.
This weekend I had an enema. I mean epiphany, ya, epiphany. You and I, though we may not have realized it, have been in a relationship for the last 16 weeks; while I haven’t been intimate with most of you, yet, it can’t change the fact that we’ve shared something here. Our little polygamous relationship (I know you’ve been reading other columns) is about to come to an end for a short while, and I want to do something special.
As we prepare ourselves for a much needed break, I thought I’d do something a little different (mostly because I have the attention span of a fluffy little kitty), a poem perhaps. So I’ve thrown away the old opinion writing mold and I’m paving new ground by writing an opinion poem. Its still in it’s infancy so be kind.
Here we go.
So we’ve only two weeks left, we gotta try to see the end, sort through all the extra heft, just thought I’d recommend. Hope someone’s keepin’ track of these days, as there heatin’ up tryin’ to faze, it’s too early to tell, can’t wait for this parties farewell, as we’ve only two weeks left.
At semesters end, we will sip our champagne, enjoying the promise of a month long bend, for which I’m sure I won’t abstain. All the stress will have passed, and although we’ll be gassed (I’ve convinced my parents that D’s aren’t just for the assed).
For you see, this school thing is more then physical, body and mind intertwined, united in some way mystical, and we gotta save ourselves from this mess, try and draw a line, and hope that we may not transgress, find some peace of mind, for you see.
God I hope someone’s keepin’ track of these days, as there heatin’ up tryin’ to faze, and it’s too early to tell, can’t wait for much farewell, as we’ve only two weeks left.
As this column dwindles and dies, a piece of advice you might find wise: If we stay with it, stay hungry to find, something unknown something so divine, we’ll find we’re better off for our struggles, better for our hardships and juggles. So as we continue on our journeys to find fate, we could become famous, we may become great, in which case we’d all better start thanking this university we call State.
Kevin Dudley is a senior natural resources major. His column appears every Wednesday in the Collegian. Replies and feedback can be sent to email@example.com.