I saw a squirrel eating a nut. Then it threw the nut down and said in a British accent, "Effin' nuts! Fed up with 'em always. I long for a grapefruit."
The paper writes such meaningful articles, like my freshman year "How to pick a bike lock," and on Tuesday, "Stealing from the campus is easy late at night!" What is next, "How to severely hurt people without getting into trouble?"
If you ever catch on fire, try to avoid looking at yourself in the mirror, because that's what REALLY throws you into a panic.
Observation from reading the paper: For every action, there is a corresponding overreaction.
To nice guys: Maybe you should consider testing a different population of girls … I know a lot of us don't respond well to "jerks" and would prefer nice guys. Don't give up; nice guys don't always finish last. 🙂
Is anyone else tired of all these "nice guys" complaining about how they can't get the girl? Honestly, grow a pair and tell her how you feel. Either she will appreciate the honesty or she is not worth your time. Anyway, you've got nothing to lose, especially if you don't want to be friends with her… Right?
Why do others care what someone else wears to class? You're being hypocritical: You wear what you want; they should be allowed to wear what they want, not what you want them to wear. And to all you ladies who do look really fantastic when you go to class: Don't change! It's one of the small pleasures us males can enjoy before we get stuck in a cubicle the rest of our lives. Thank you!