To the gurl who called football players jurks: I apologise on behaf of my teem member. Sometims we are reely dum. He is still lerning how to be humun. I wuld never hav dun that to a pritty gurl like yurself. We cant all be nise and like gentelmen.
All right, so I'm OK with the people who ace the O-Chem tests and ruin the curve for everybody. But if in 20 years they haven't found a cure for cancer…I'm gonna be pissed.
To the squirrel that's been eating our pumpkins: Yes, we do have your tail.
My Dearest Tom Welling (Superman from "Smallville"),
Yesterday was the most magical night of my life. Not only because of your super strength, but because of your super speed. I want you, I need you, I need you more than Lucky needs his Lucky Charms…Shimmy Shimmy Cocoa Pop….Shimmy Shimmy Why???…Because I love you!
P.S. Remember to bring the strawberry syrup next time…you know what brand I like!
While making supper, my boyfriend (an engineer, NOT a biologist) suggested we cook the chicken a bit longer so we didn't get "ovarian flu." Mmhmm, like he could get that.
Looking for female nanny with fun personality and lots of energy to look after 20-year-old male. Must like moonlit walks on the beach, poetry by candlelight and UNO.