I don't care if Barry Bonds or Sammy Sosa used steroids while chasing records.
But if I had to pick my favorite embattled star, I'd have to go with Sammy.
Ah, Sammy. You gave Mark McGwire a run for his money during his record-breaking season. You stuck with the Cubs for way longer than you needed to and gave the poor Cubs fans something to cheer about when you hopped across home plate after hitting a home run and ran onto the field with gusto.
You had cork found in your bat and didn't deny it. You kiss your fingers and love that camera in the dugout. You won't have a good season this year with the Orioles and won't be on any of my fantasy teams, but I like you anyway.
And the best part is that you aren't Barry Bonds.
Barry Bonds annoys me in too many ways to list, but here are a few reasons. He walks too much. He wears a huge pad on his elbow so he can attempt to get hit by pitches. He whines and blames everyone else for his problems.
He also plays for the Giants, who I strongly dislike, but even if he played for the White Sox, I would still despise him.
A few weeks ago when there were rumors that big Barry would finally move on to green pastures as opposed to the outfield, I was thrilled. Awesome, I thought, no more whining Barry and I wouldn't have to see his earring dangling in the wind anymore.
But unlike Sammy Sosa, who said he knows he will not be playing after the age of 40, Barry doesn't know when to quit. Sosa, 36, said recently he knows that he will retire before he hits that age, no matter how close he is to 700 career home runs.
I just wish Barry would follow suit.
Bonds, 41, tells us he's tired and he whines about people picking on him. He says his heart is not in the game anymore. And he still won't go away.
Personally, if my job annoyed me so much that I started telling people that they were making me want to jump off a bridge, I'd quit.
Barry has money so he wouldn't be out on the street if he quit. He already has his name stamped all over the record books.
He hasn't broken the career record for home runs, but he doesn't need to. He doesn't need to hit any more home runs for people to remember him as one of the greatest hitters in baseball history. In 20 years, I really doubt anyone will still be thinking about if he used steroids or not. The future baseball nuts will look at his records and realize, yeah, he could hit the ball.
So please, Barry, spare us your hissy fits and take a lesson from Sammy. It's time for the next phase of your life. It's time to retire.
Stephanie Lindberg is a senior journalism major.