Have you ever had an onslaught of confusion take over your senses so suddenly you almost don't realize it has happened? Well, that is what happened to a lot of unlucky moviegoers this weekend as they took their seats and the new Keanu Reeves movie, "Constantine," began rolling.
Touted to be the biggest comic-book blockbuster favorite since "X-Men," the movie sure did a good job of taking the backseat to such bombs as "Daredevil" and "Alien vs. Predator."
Reeves stars as John Constantine himself, the nomadic supernatural detective on a lifelong mission to make it to heaven while fighting off demons and other unsightly creatures. Along the way, he teams up with Angela Dodson, played by Rachel Weisz, a police woman trying to solve the peculiar suicide of her twin sister. Constantine gives Angela the power to see the otherworldly creatures and the two find themselves in the world of angels and demons located just beneath the one and only Los Angeles.
The hype for this flick seemed so solid for so long and the question seemed to be: How can you go wrong with a mysterious character seemingly stuck in a present-day Purgatory, super evil demons and exorcisms, intriguing biblical references with a fictional twist and a beautiful sidekick along for the ride?
Well, someone must have asked director Francis Lawrence that very question, and his response came in the form of a movie. There is very little, if any, character development whatsoever. Lawrence just plopped the characters down in front and let them play without telling anything about their past or their reasoning for their actions.
It felt like there was a "buy one movie ticket, get one plot hole," special at the theater this weekend as the story jumped around more than a kangaroo with Flubber in its sneakers. If you're ever in charge of a potentially great film, do everyone a favor and put some significance into the story and give the audience at least a hint of an emotional tie to the characters.
There are too many movies coming out that fit the same formula: big-name actors who can't act, huge plot potential that doesn't pull through, eye-boggling computer graphics, one really good scene to remember when walking out, and horrible writing. If you are someone who is a Keanu fan and loves "Matrix: Revolution" this will be the icing on your cake. However, if you think comic-book movies suck and Keanu should have stayed on the surfboard with Patrick Swayze, stay away. Stay far, far away.
1.5 out of 4 rams