– "I Hate Myself and I Wanna Die." Kurt Cobain, signing off.
– To all the basketball players in the rec. center you guys are terrible. You think you're good, but you're not.
– I wish you wouldn't look at me like that Napoleon. I wish you would get out of my life and shut up!
– Nobody reads Doonesbury or Dilbert. They both suck, and if you read them, you are an idiot.
– Ward Churchill needs to be put in a little black hole. Word.
– Who is this Big-D from the Internet? And why does he monopolize everything on the Internet?
– How come there's only skinny girls working out at the gym? Don't you think there should be all fat girls?
– I am sick of Vincent Adams bashing the life of a college student.
– Oscarson, quit eating my bananas and drinking my milk! Get your own!
– I wish people could learn to use double doors – its just like a road – stay to
– I love when it's 20 degrees outside and you still see girls in their foo-foo skirts. (Sigh)
– What is under the Pillsbury Doughboy's apron? … Doughnuts!