May 012003
Authors: Jon Ackerman

What would you do if Rick Majerus, Utah’s head men’s basketball coach, showed up around 1:30 a.m. at your apartment party?

a) Take pictures of him kissing girls and girls kissing him, b) Feed him more beer and then get upset when he stays until 5 in the morning, c) Bash on his team because it just lost to your school, d) A combination of answers a, b, and c, or e) Have fun with him just like any other old forty-something man

Personally, I’d choose e) because I know when my pops comes up to visit me, he’s the hit of the party, and not just because the more he drinks the more tabs he picks up. There’s just something about wasted old men reliving their college days while giving us something to look forward to.

But apparently, some students at the University of Missouri chose d) when visiting Iowa State head basketball coach Larry Eustachy showed up at a party Jan. 22. Now the guy could possibly lose his job – he refuses to resign, but was suspended with pay Wednesday – all because those pictures were turned into the Des Moines Register and published in the paper on Monday.

Image really is everything these days, isn’t it? This guy’s an amazing coach, a former National Coach of the Year (2000). He resurrected the Cyclones’ basketball program, winning two Big XII titles (2000, 2001) and taking his team to the Elite Eight.

But he spends a night boozing with some college kids and now the athletic director wants him fired?

It’s not like Eustachy is some guy who can’t relate to his players, like many old-balls coaches around the country. The players love him. And apparently, so do many other college students. What’s wrong with that?

Oh, he was drinking. Because every other coach in this world doesn’t do the same exact thing after his team loses, right? Eustachy just did it with others, rather than all alone.

Oh, he was kissing college-aged females. So. There was no tongue massaging, there was no heavy petting, and there was definitely no sex. So he’s a flirt. What straight guy isn’t when he’s had a couple eight Natural Ices?

(Funny side note: at a fraternity party on the Kansas State campus that Eustachy was also reportedly at, he was quoted as telling one female, after she said she was from Lawrence, home to the University of Kansas, “What are you doing here? Why aren’t you going to KU? The girls down there are much hotter. You belong there.”)

But he’s a public figure, the state of Iowa’s highest-paid public employee, and he’s portraying the wrong image for Iowa State, right? The Cyclones will have trouble recruiting if Eustachy stays on as coach.

Yeah, well, the Cyclones may have trouble fielding a team without Eustachy, considering a handful of players said they might walk with their coach.

If I’m an Iowa State recruit, Iowa State’s now on the top of my list. You know Eustachy will throw one hell of an end-of-the-season party.

Cut him some slack. This guy’s afraid to fly, so he chooses to drive to every road game. That’s why he was still around late night on these campuses. How can you blame the man for wanting to party it up with the college crowd, especially the female crowd, after a tough day?

Every guy I know out of college still wishes he was in college.

So, if ISU fires Eustachy, I say CSU hire him (and my opinion means a lot, considering I’m a few states away at a school ISU competes against in nothing).

No offense to you, Dale Layer, you’ve done a hell of a job with our men’s basketball team. I just don’t think you’d ever try a four-man beer bong with me at a frat party.

Jon is a senior journalism major and the Collegian sports editor.

 Posted by at 5:00 pm

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