Disclaimer: before reading this, rid yourself of all scrunchies, fanny-packs, silly bands, visors, ponchos, crocs and any other trendy products.
Society sorts through its own variety of phases, likes and dislikes. This is understandable. But there are numerous trends whose popularity is inexplicable.
We can begin with the 1990s. Donâ€™t get me wrong; the 1990s were simply incredible, yet they were filled with too many foul fads.
For starters, what about the ever-so-admirable barbed wire wrap that is etched onto oneâ€™s upper arm? What is this supposed to say about the individual? Most tattoos have some kind of meaning or â€œmake a statement;â€ however, the barbed wire only relays the message that this person was most likely bored, and possibly drunk, one afternoon and liked the design when he saw it earlier that day on a fellow customer in some Stop nâ€™ Save.
But can we talk about scrunchies for a minute? Iâ€™m one person who is unbelievably guilty of passing through this phase. But why would you ever need an obnoxious, oversized, flamboyantly-colored hair tie? We just couldnâ€™t sleep at night thinking about the possibilities beyond the too average, lame piece of elastic thatâ€™s here to strictly do its job rather than grab peopleâ€™s attention with the flare and glitter of a scrunchy.
We also need to discuss the fanny pack. I understand that these are amazingly convenient but letâ€™s hang onto those purses and/or backpacks please.
First thing that comes to my mind when I think of or spot a fanny pack would be those women who take their hiking to the next level. They think of themselves as the ultimate, crazy, outdoorsy people â€¦ and so ultimate in fact, that they need to bring their fanny pack filled with Band-Aids, triple antibiotic and the trail mix that they picked up on the way out of town.
For now weâ€™ll move onto the bigger and better ideas of the 2000s. Thank heavens for edible shoes; we have Crocs to solve this inconvenience. And because crocs werenâ€™t bad enough, we thought it would be a good idea to create flare for your Crocs. Why would anyone ever need to pin gems and cartoon faces to their kicks? Itâ€™s something Iâ€™ll never understand.
Now, we donâ€™t have time to cover every one of these concepts, but they should be recognized for their participation in the latest infomercials and wardrobe accessories: Snuggies, Bump-its, leggings as pants when your top does not cover your back end and tall tees. Iâ€™m sure Iâ€™ve missed countless trends that should have been included here, but I only have so much room per column.
One thing we have to go over is those wretched Silly Bandz. New Pokemon my ass. People have said that Silly Bandz are replacing Pokemon trading cards. While those cards have largely faded away on their own, they are still fairly popular with youngins.
But when it comes to Silly Bandz, I think itâ€™s safe to say that, whether they admit it or not, everyone knows good and well that those are only for children. I canâ€™t speak for other universities, but CSU students are enthralled by these. People buy them, trade them and flaunt them wearing ridiculous numbers of them all over both arms. Theses bandz hold too much undeserved value and hype.
Weâ€™ll have to wrap up with the odds and ends that donâ€™t really fit in a category and/or time era: visors, shirts that read something like â€œyour boyfriend is staring at meâ€ or â€œ99 percent Devil, 1 percent Angel,â€ lip liner (unless itâ€™s actually the same color as your lips), shutter shades (whatâ€™s the purpose?), overalls (unless it pertains to your profession) and finally ponchos (that arenâ€™t used in the rain).
We can be thankful for the fact that most of these fads are only temporary; others have stuck around for longer than necessary. But I realize that we will endure and take part in many more to come. Until then we can laugh at how goofy people look while engaging in the latest rage.
Molly Ungerer is a sophomore journalism major. Her column appears Tuesdays in the Collegian. Letters and feedback can be sent to firstname.lastname@example.org.