*Professor: Can you please get my score from this test posted sooner so I can start drinking it off? Thanks.
*I woke up to Ritz crackers on our lawn, a Keystone behind the hedge and barf on the rental car. Oh man, we have become that house.
*Itâ€™s kinda sad when I almost score as much as the Rams and Iâ€™m a virgin.
*How many people am I stalking if I watch the guy in front of me in class look around on Facebook?
*You know youâ€™re too drunk when youâ€™re on the phone with Taco Bell promising a large tip if they deliver.
*To the three girls walking drunk on Shields at 2 a.m., itâ€™s a little early for a walk of shame donâ€™t you think?