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May 032010
Authors: Compiled by Heidi Reitmeier

Dating Pro-Tip: If the cops show up to your first date to talk to the guy you’re with, you should probably consider running away and not talking to him anymore.

Dear students: I throw away the papers you turn in at the end of the semester without reading them because the grammar and unoriginality depresses me.

If I had an hour left to live, I’d spend it in CO 300 because it feels like an eternity.

To the girl who lost one shoe in the girl’s bathroom: I am sorry, but Prince Charming can’t go in there.

To the two squirrels mating in front of me: Get a room.

 Posted by at 3:55 pm

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