To the girl who flipped backward out of her chair onto the floor in the library: Your dignity is sitting under the table next to where your head hit the ground.
The middle of the day is the perfect time to assume your roommate wonâ€™t be returning so that you can get busy.
The Red Bull truck for college students is the equivalent to an ice cream truck for 7-year-olds.
To the guy at the Rec center whining to his mom about going to Hawaii and not Australia or Europe: Please fall into a volcano.
I still say that the student body president should be decided by a cage fight.