Feb 102010
Authors: Compiled by Heidi Reitmeier

As a guy, I’m offended by the comment that men only have two emotions. We have three. Sometimes we also get thirsty and in that case, get us a beer.

Texting and walking: Banned due to excess collisions during peak rush times.

The “new” Facebook is like trying something new with someone who is mediocre in bed. At first you are hopeful, then you realize it’s all the same stuff just in different places.

No woman will ever be truly satisfied on Valentine’s Day because no man has a chocolate penis wrapped in money that ejaculates diamonds.

I got a flyer today that said “Jesus and Beer.” I think the religious people on the Plaza are finally getting it right.

 Posted by at 2:28 pm

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