I don’t have sugar daddies. I have official sponsors.
Is it bad that in the eighth week of school, you still look at your schedule to see where your classes are?
College: the only place you’ll see a 50-year-old guy cruisin’ on a longboard.
What happens when your super secret parking spot isn’t so secret anymore? EEEHHHHFFFF!
CSU: Construction Site University
Thank God they found that kid in the balloon. For a while I thought Michael Jackson ordered takeout from heaven.
Today on Facebook I learned I should be a princess for Halloween, I will have 2.2 kids, live to 78, die by falling off a bridge, marry a guy named Carl, and make $2.2 million in my lifetime. Why can’t I learn this much in school?