Sep 162009
Authors: Glen Pfeiffer, Ryan Gibbons

It’s been a while since we visited Facebook (well, in this column at least, sigh). Ahem, by-the-by, we have a fan page on that site now so … you get the gist. Join us, and together we shall rule the galaxy as … oh, wait, that quote doesn’t make any sense in this situation.

So what’s new with Facebook? Well, our expertly opinionated subconsciousness is telling us that it’s about time to write the second half of the yet unpublished “The Rise and Fall of Facebook”. Yep, we said it — we’re waiting for the next big thing. It’s almost inevitable that Facebook will follow in the steps of MySpace and be pushed aside for something better.

Just look at how easily MySpace fell out of favor when Facebook came along. MySpace is now a punch line, but if you look deep into your soul you will remember that you were once as crazy about it as you are Facebook.

Today, Facebook is becoming inundated by the generation that raised the students who made it popular. The Internet abounds with guides written by excitable adult-types about all the great benefits of this new-fangled site and etiquette guides for how to use it. Once upon a time, it was only open to college students, and the spirit of the site did not involve checking any etiquette guides before meekly making a wall post.

The more widely adopted Facebook becomes, the less hip and cool it will become, and college students will migrate to something newer — their own playground. If your parents hogged your tinker toys to play with themselves when you were 4 years old, wouldn’t your reaction usually be to give up and find something else? And so we wait.

But in the meantime, Facebook is what we’ve got, and they have updates!

To bring back an old segment of Bill Nye’s show: Did You Know That — Some people actually still have dial-up Internet connections? Now you know.

In some places like South Africa (and Iraq) the Internet conditions are so bad that a few hardcore geeks proved that a homing pigeon can actually fly 4GB of data 60 miles much faster than the Internet service provider can electronically.

This makes us wonder, “Why isn’t Bill Gates on TV with a poor malconnectionally nourished nerd of Africa asking for viewers to donate money to increase his bandwidth?”

In classic American fashion, a solution has been made that doesn’t solve the problem but helps get around it. Introducing Facebook Lite. Think of it as a mobile version of Facebook but for your computer. They’ve done away with things like chat, live notifications, all third party apps and even a few of the ads while preserving the basic functionality of Facebook.

We’ve been using the Lite site for the past few days, and we’ve actually found it quite refreshing (oh how our yearnings for bygone third-party, app-less days are fulfilled). The only thing holding us back from making it our primary page is the lack of the chat function and not being able to view fan pages, such as ours (search for Binary Boys).

This “lite” site can be accessed at

Facebook also made it’s first major overhaul to its iPhone app. It’s beautiful. Every time we use it, we want to just sacrifice the Web version and stick with the phone. The biggest problem is that we can’t play FarmVille from the phone. And how could this college campus keep running without FarmVille? We are an ag school, after all. No wonder it’s so popular. Way to get in touch with your roots CSU.

Columnists Glen Pfeiffer and Ryan Gibbons can be reached at Candy Mountain. Report sightings of magical leoplurodons to

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