All-Star Entertainment

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Feb 132006
 
Authors: Brett Okamoto

It's pretty simple if you ask me. If you take the fans out of the selection process, you take the fans out of the whole thing.

With the NBA All-Star game approaching, the questions are swarming around what players are there as a joke, and what a joke it is that others were left out. Some believe that fans' votes should not be counted anymore because they aren't as educated on the players as the media is.

Who is the All-Star game for though? Is it for the media, who get to sit at every game and talk to the players in the locker room? Or for the fans – who would rather watch the young rookie dunk through his legs over the conservative point guard who passes well?

We have to see the All-Star game for what it is, entertainment. It's for no one but the fans. That's why I guarantee you the cameras will be on Kobe and Shaq Sunday, instead of the more deserving Chauncey and Rip.

Plus have you ever seen an All-Star game? It's just an overtime of the dunk contest. It's like an And1 Mixtape gone bad. No one plays defense. No one puts up anything other than an alley-oop or a 20-foot fade-away highlight.

Fans get a bad rap for voting for stupid choices – players who apparently don't deserve to be there. But by whose standards are these criticisms applied?

I'm sure Scott is going to bring up the fact that fans voted for Amare Stoudemire this year, even though the Phoenix Sun hasn't suited up for a single game due to injury. Bad decision? No! Remember this is for entertainment. The fans want to see Amare come out in his suit and tie and maybe throw up a jumper during pregame. Maybe they want to see the man who has the words "Black Jesus" tattooed on his neck give them a miracle, ascending to the rim and throwing it down like only a heavenly body could.

What I'm saying is that it's not the best players that should be there; it is the most entertaining. Which is why I feel the following players should get a last-minute invite to Houston – or a last-minute booting.

Booted

Yao Ming – Any 7'6'' player who prefers the hook shot over the posterizing flush over his opponent need not attend.

Tim Duncan – Because he violates the golden rule of the All-Star game. "Thou shalt not shoot a bank shot. Ever."

Accepted

Ron Artest – Let's create an entirely new contest for this guy. Twenty minutes in the ring with the East's Ben Wallace. No kicking, biting or throwing beer cups.

Darko Milicic – Personally, I don't think ole' Dark remembers why he came to America. With all his fellow Pistons on the court though, let's get D.M. on the bench to make them feel at home.

 Posted by at 5:00 pm

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