Wow! Nothing like a jury summons scheduled for spring break to remind you that you are now an adult and a registered voter.
To all the ladies out there: I think you should leave the toilet seat up for us guys! Honestly, we are spending so much time preparing for Valentine's Day. It's the least you can do.
It is true that Chuck Norris is one bad man but it is no secret to why he is so jacked. He and his beautiful wife use the Total Gym for just twenty minutes a day every day. Now that is something one can admire.
HELP WANTED! You know when you are trying to be nice and tell a guy you are no longer interested in any kind of way but they just DON'T GET IT! Where do you go from here? Do we HAVE to be mean?! We tried to be nice, but the bitch claws may need to come out. Someone please help before another week of misery drags on.
Bike Riders: The fact you ride in the street means you are considered a vehicle! This is a lot of responsibility, as you now have to stop at stop signs and obey other such laws of the road. The next time I'm in my car and get cut off by a biker riding his bike through a stop sign, there will be a "vehicle collision." And there will be laughter.
To the Crossword God: We, whom you charismatically address as "idiots," kneel before thee and say, "We are not worthy!" No one can hold a candle to your crossword awesomeness, especially those CSU peons who have better things to do than figure out an impossible crossword puzzle. All hail the Crossword God. Signed, your faithful peons who don't think you're an arrogant S.O.B. (at least to your face.)
While intoxicated, I bought 800 POGS online and ALWAYS play for keeps.
No one, and I mean NO ONE, can beat the OJ Slammer in POGS. That was my favorite slammer of all times. See ya, wouldn't want to be ya.