Let’s all hibernate

Oct 102005
Authors: Megan Schulz

It's rainy and gray outside and that can only mean one thing: it's definitely not summer anymore. Fall is my favorite season and with good reason. My birthday is in the fall, the colors are beautiful and we get to celebrate Halloween. Ever since I was a kid, I've loved the once-a-year treat of picking out a great costume. The only thing I don't like about fall is walking to class in the rain and cold. It's enough to make me want to be a hermit.

Animals hibernate to protect themselves from the cold when food is scarce and normal body temperature can't be maintained. As far as I'm concerned, dorm food options are looking pretty scarce. And when I'm walking to class in the wind and rain, my hair is being whipped around and mascara is running down my face. It doesn't look pretty or normal. I've suffered an off-and-on flu for the past two weeks. I should blame my poor sleeping patterns or my less than stellar diet, but I'm going to blame the weather.

If you can survive the shock of waking up with a rug on your legs because you haven't shaved in months, hibernation doesn't sound like such a bad idea. But maybe we should consider a less extreme alternative to the inclement weather. We could all be hermits and stay cooped up in our rooms or houses, leaving only when necessary. Most drug addicts and Halo 2 players already behave like this, so it shouldn't be too difficult. The Internet alone can provide weeks of entertainment.

Many of those who are actually hermits base it on a spiritual and emotional need for solitude, not an aversion to cold weather. But I don't need solitude because I'd go out of my mind from boredom and lack of human contact. There are only so many "Real World" reruns I can watch. I'm just looking for an excuse to be lazy. My attitude may be negative, but I'm too stubborn to change.

Although I'm from Colorado, I'm not an avid skier or snowboarder. I just can't get excited about snow. Other than the fact that it looks pretty, it does nothing for me. There are few things I hate more than sitting in class with soaking wet pants after trekking in the snow. When I was younger, I never remember complaining about snow. In fact, I loved it. A school snow day was an excuse to play outside all day long. As I grew older, it became a day to waste by sleeping.

I know that I'll survive the cold weather because I did last year. I even emerged into spring 2005 without suffering from frostbite or too many skipped classes. Somehow, my unconventional methods worked for me, even if they involved a lot of whining and complaining. I think that we should be allowed to complain sometimes. It can be a good way to relieve stress. If penguins from Antarctica could talk, I'm sure we'd hear them complaining about how cold they are. But lucky for us, we have access to hot chocolate and snow pants.

Megan Schulz is a sophomore technical journalism major. Her column runs every Tuesday in the Collegian.

 Posted by at 5:00 pm

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