I am, like, totally so disenfranchised with the content of the weekly Friday Collegian sports column, "Only Our Opinion Matters," (penned by Dumb and Dumber). I'm thinking, like, these two frat boys know nothing at all about sports and are, like, totally posers desperately trying to prove their manliness by writing this absolute, like, bore of a column. It's, like, totally bogus DUDE!
I'm sorry, boys, but your column is crap. You know very little about sports, and trying to substitute arrogance for knowledge will only have an effect on the truly ignorant. Do some research (like reading Ramnation.com or ESPN.com), develop some original ideas and, for the love of God, quit writing like a couple of sorority chicks!
You, like, have a totally awesome opportunity in a fine student newspaper and all you're, like, accomplishing is making a collective, like, fool of yourselves. Take a cue from your assistant sports editor, Jon Pilsner, a unique and knowledgeable talent with boundless potential in sports journalism, and educate yourselves. For you must realize that philosophically and fundamentally, "Life is sport, and sport is life." It should never be trivialized.