Only Our Opinions Matter

 Uncategorized
Apr 282004
 
Authors: Scott Bondy, Paul Baker

Topic 1: After being traded to the New York Giants, Eli Manning,

America’s new crybaby athlete, hopes to compete for the starting

quarterback position. Does he deserve such an honor?

Baker: A rookie QB should sit the bench the first year and learn

the system.

Bondy: The Giants are paying a lot of money to get this guy. He

needs the experience so I say put him in there.

Baker: Guys like John Elway, Troy Aikman, and Terry Bradshaw

proved that great quarterbacks need time to develop.

Bondy: Guys like Eli’s brother Peyton proved that you don’t.

Peyton passed for over 3,700 yards and threw 26 TDs his rookie

year.

Baker: What a ridiculous argument. Next topic!

Topic 2: Sticking with the football news, some hometown guys

were picked in the NFL draft this past weekend. Who has a better

chance of making a roster?

Bondy: I’m pulling for Bradlee because there’s no way I can root

for a guy who’s going to Philly. Go Cowboys!

Baker: Dexter has a way better chance of playing. The Broncos

should’ve used their picks more wisely.

Bondy: CSU is turning into a farm team for the Broncos nowadays.

Bradlee and Cecil Sapp can have a little reunion.

Baker: Props to Andre Sommersell for getting drafted, although

I’m a Raider hater.

Topic 3: We’re already bored with the NBA playoffs. Since they

moved the beginning rounds to a 7-game format, a league already

lacking viewership has plummeted even more. What should the NBA

do?

Baker: The only thing that ever mattered was the NBA Finals.

Fast forward through the rest and wake me up.

Bondy: Are the playoffs still going on? I’ve got a simple

solution to everything.

Baker: Let me guess? You want to contract basketball, too?

Bondy: No. I think they should make the playoffs like the NCAA

Final Four Tournament.

Baker: There aren’t enough teams.

Bondy: Use the same amount of teams. Single elimination.

Playoffs are done in a week.

Baker: You’re a genius.

Topic 4: It’s a toss up. Who is the better Hilton? Paris or

Nikki?

Bondy: Probably Nikki.

Baker: Are you kidding me? Paris. Have you seen the

“videotape”?

Topic 5: The Nuggets face a 3-1 deficit to the T’Wolves after

losing Game 4 84-82. Is there any hope left for Denver to win the

series?

Bondy: They’re done. Overmatched and outplayed.

Baker: If Melo (two points on 1-of-16 shooting) plays better,

the Nugg-puppies will take it to seven.

Bondy: Melo’s had one good game this series, he looks tired, and

he’s probably pissed about the rumors concerning him and Christina

Aguilera.

Baker: Yeah, but I would go out with her.

Closing Statement: Hats off to Pat Tillman, not just a great

athlete, but a great man who turned down money to fight for our

country. This man should be thought of with the highest regard and

be a symbol for those to respect and admire.

That’s it boys and girls. We’ll try to do better the next

time.

 Posted by at 5:00 pm

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