Random Ram: Kerrie Holmes

 Uncategorized
Mar 032004
 
Authors: Eric Klamper

It all started with a seemingly innocent trip to Copper Mountain

for some spring riding.

“It was warm out so we decided to wear our swimsuits,” said

Kerrie Holmes, a sophomore business major. “We had no idea that

there was a contest going on that day.”

Being two young, good-looking women, Holmes and her roommate

Jessica Fisher caught the eye of everyone and were repeatedly asked

if they were competing in the swimsuit snowboarding competition.

Even the lift operators tried to entice them to participate.

“We didn’t want anything to do with it, but these guys, who we

had just met that day, went behind our backs and paid for us to be

in the competition,” Holmes said. “I don’t know how it happened or

why we agreed to it, but the next thing I remember, we were hiking

up the run in our swimsuits. There were literally thousands and

thousands of people gathered around the run and waiting at the

bottom.”

Holmes and Fisher had a serious advantage as they were the

youngest and therefore “perkiest” of the competitors.

“Most of the women were in their 30s and starting to sag,”

Holmes said. “They all had on crazy things like super-tiny thongs

and cotton balls over their nipples. They had no sexual inhibitions

whatsoever.”

Swimsuit snowboarding competitions are not exactly a regular

part of these girls’ weekends, however, they knew that they would

need to shed a bit of their youth-induced innocence if they were to

have a chance at impressing the mass of onlookers. The DJ

apparently noticed the girls and chose to play Christina Aguilera’s

song ‘Dirty’ to inspire an entertaining run.

“Right before I started, this old guy handed me a water bottle,

so I carried it down with me. We rode down, but there wasn’t

anything really interesting about it. Then, about half-way down, we

stopped riding and danced around a bit just because we didn’t know

what else to do. I was squirting the water bottle at Jessica and

she was slicking her hair back with it.” Holmes said. “We just

laughed at each other the whole way. When we finally got to the end

of the run, we were all happy and we kissed each other. It was just

barely a peck but everyone went freaking nuts.”

Cameras were flashing and men were hollering with delight at the

glorious sight of two bikinied women touching lips.

Holmes and Fisher were awarded first prize and received season

passes at Copper Mountain.

“I was happy about winning the pass but there was this concern

in the back of my mind that a picture of Jess and I kissing would

be in the paper or something,” Holmes said.

The picture never made it in the mountain newspapers. It did,

however, grace the pages of TransWorld Snowboarding magazine, a

very popular national publication, in an article about the best

things at Copper Mountain.

“They took that picture right at the exact second that we

pecked. It looks so much worse than it was. Our heads are tilted to

the side and everything. It was so innocent and now it looks all

raunchy. It’s really embarrassing,” Holmes said.

At any rate, TransWorld subscriptions have most likely

increased.

 Posted by at 5:00 pm

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