Porn Reality Show

Nov 062003
Authors: Carl McCutchen

All right, I can take a fifth season of “Survivor,” maybe I can

endure another season of “The Bachelor” and I honestly hope for an

encore of the “Joe Schmoe” show, but I cannot take any more cheesy

reality TV show ideas, especially ones that come from the adult

film industry.

Seriously, the whole reality TV show idea is getting out of


On Monday, a company called Silhouette Productions, which as far

as I could tell only makes porn films, announced plans to create a

new reality TV show called “Can You Be a Pornstar?” The show would

only air on iN Demand networks and pay-per-view channels, so those

of us with regular cable wouldn’t have to see it unless we choose


The production company said they plan to shoot seven one-hour

episodes that will air beginning Jan. 8.

According to a press release issued from Silhouette, the contest

is for 28 women who yearn to be porn stars. In each episode, four

of the women will arrive at a house in Los Angeles and be subjected

to photo shoots, interviews and what Silhouette Productions has

called “surprises.” The winner of the show will get a one-year

contract with a major adult film company and also receive $100,000

to pad her pocket with. The company said viewers would choose the

winner during a 90-minute finale.

Harry Feingold, the CEO of Silhouette Productions, said “It’s

like ‘Paradise Hotel,’ when they go behind the scenes. Everybody

wants to know what’s going on. Well, here you see it.”

Well, what am I going to see? I saw an episode of “Paradise

Hotel” once and it was as porno as it could get for a free TV

channel. Contestants were all over each other. Groping here, a top

flying off there, it was obviously out of control. And now, this

whole idea of having to pay to watch some girl become a porn star

is ridiculous. Besides, I already saw this scenario the last time I

went to the adult movie store and picked up a copy of “Extreme

Jeanine.” It had interviews with girls, really nice photos and what

happened in it sure came as a surprise to me! So why would I want

to only be able to watch a show once, for only an hour, and then

have to buy it again? Well, I don’t, and I won’t.

Not only is the whole idea of a porno reality TV show a horrible

regurgitation of the many reality TV shows already being produced,

or a horrible copy of the millions of porn films I could easily

purchase on E-Bay, but hardcore porn also just doesn’t fit into

good family TV-watching these days. How can we have hardcore

reality porn shows when there’s hardly any soft-core, quality porn

on late at night anymore?

In fact, the last time I thought I saw pornography on TV was

when I ran across an episode of “Hot Springs Hotel” on a late-night

movie channel. I wouldn’t even call it porn, but the acting was so

terrible that it couldn’t be anything but soft-core. I even had to

wait 10 or 15 minutes to see a naked person, and then it was only

for a second. That’s not much sex considering it was only a

half-hour show. It was disappointing and horrible, so I can’t see

how anyone could bother to conjure up a hardcore porn show and

actuality put it on TV.

What kind of quality could this show have? If it models any of

the porn films I watched during the seventh grade, then I’d rather

watch an old episode of “Beverly Hills 90210” because at least

Jennie Garth had something to offer.

I guess I should be thankful that the show will only be aired on

pay-per-view and iN Demand channels though, because that way I know

that little girls won’t be turning on the show and learning how to

be the next Chasey Lain. I have to hand it to Silhouette

Productions for at least thinking of that, since they didn’t

consider much else in inventing this show.

I do realize, however, that in American culture sex ultimately

sells, and I guess that is what the production company is going to

rely on for this show to be a success. With so many sex-driven

males in America, it’s sure to be a hit somewhere. You just won’t

see it at my house.

In the press release issued by Silhouette Productions, Feingold

said “Pay-per-view gives us the freedom to take reality television

where it has never gone before. The last stigma today for audiences

isn’t renting adult films, it’s admitting it, and this series

offers viewers a fun, behind-the-scenes look at the star-making

process in a multi-billion dollar industry.”

All I could say is the only place porn could go that it hasn’t

been before is off the air. If you really want to watch this new

porno show that badly rent it or buy it, but don’t make me waste my

time by having to watch the worst reality show’s description scroll

across my TV Guide channel.




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